Life As Usual

But harder.

Now that we’re weeks (years? I dunno) into quarantining and social distancing, I’ve had friends ask how it is for me.

For reference, I live in Seattle close to downtown. I am an essential worker. My employer does offer work from home currently however, my living space does not work with that. It is noisy (I have to take phone calls), I don’t have the space for a desk or work area and there is a whole other human being within close proximity when I’m at home so that is not happening.

[image description: the author, a brown skinned femme in glasses wearing a printed mask, glasses, a black and white headwrap and blue headphones]

On the surface of things, my life is business as usual. I’m the breadwinner due to my partner being disabled. If there are things to be done, I have to do them. I am a person who does not make decisions based necessarily on what only I want or need. I’m solely responsible for keeping my little family fed and housed.

That is my regular life. I’m a shitbucket of stress and anxiety in the best of times. My family is frequently in a precarious position because our cost of living has so far exceeded my income. I vibrate on a whole other plane of existential dread and live in absolute fear of shit happening. And of course, shit always happens.

Now this shit has happened. The first news reports sent me off to my budget spreadsheet (it is real sexy and dynamic so I can change shit on the fly AND keep my base budget intact), I crunched…